Saturday, September 30, 2006
shifted blog. for particular reasons.
dEaDhEaRt ;
2:31 AM
Sunday, September 24, 2006
ok so here i am bloggin again after some ancient tym ago of not bloggin cos i'm being force by my la0g0ng who dearly misses my sweet posts. MUAHAHAHAHAHAS!ok la let not b bhb le la. won't b able to blog much anymore cos the com at home's spoilt. i'm heartbroken...B2 will have to go soon...i dowann emm to go...i wanna keep em...sigh y?but anyway i have to thank my darling who supportin me thou makin me pissed n hurt at tyms but ya he's sweet. hahahas he'll kill me upon readin this part...hrmm i found out some stuff makin me disappointed in some ppl. idunnoe what to blog leh...stuupid don la. lol. i usually blog only when i'm emo la....ok now EOY i wish every1 best of luck n me myself too =))))))))))))
signin off.
<33s~!
zhEnNy ah gIrL
dEaDhEaRt ;
6:27 AM
Friday, September 15, 2006
sorry for the extreme lag inbloggin.been really busy lately. exam round the corner n on top of that i found kittens to look after.sunday i found 7 kittens n the night i returned 5 to the mother cat n kept 2. B square i call em. baBy & brownie.
i can't beleved i cried 3 tyms today.i hate this ok? some how some what y can't things go right for my loved ones?stead family closed ones. i hate seein dem upset. in such a screwed upp mood. makes me wanna curse & swear...n the kittens thou i love em, has kept me upp fer a few nights le. n 'm in a rather bad mood.....
KNNBCCB NNN FUCKIN MUTHA CB NB KBBP CCB GRAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
sis backk gtg
dEaDhEaRt ;
8:59 AM
Thursday, September 07, 2006
OMYGOD YOU SO HAVE TA SEE THIS ITS SO @#$%^&*(#$%) FARNIE!!
http://www.dumpalink.com/media/1148029464/Lost_Reality..._He_Said_She_Said
lols enjoy at least watch until 2min2o secs & u'll get the joke. couldn c it comin. HAHA
dEaDhEaRt ;
10:36 PM
No man/woman is worth your tears and the only one who is, will never make you cry. If you love someone, put their name in a circle, instead of a heart, because hearts can break, but circles go on forever.
Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say.
If all my friends were to jump off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them, I'd be at the bottom to catch them.
"Don't frown, because you never know who's falling in love with your smile!"
"If you judge people, you have no time to love them"
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle." Plato
It takes a minute to have a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone- but it takes a lifetime to forget someone."
"Enthusiasm is contagious. You could start an epidemic!"
Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed
Some say love, it is a hunger
An endless aching need
I say love, it is a flower
And you its only seed
It's the soul afraid of dreaming,
That never learns to dance
And the soul afraid of waking,
That never takes the chance
It's the one, who won't be taken
Who cannot seem to give
And the soul afraid of dying,
That never learns to live
When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long
When you feel that love is only
For the lucky and the strong
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snow
Lies the seed that with the sun's love
In the spring becomes the rose
________________________________________
hey.
why is it so hard huh?
leavin that bhind n starting all over again.
say pshyco or whatever.
what you don't understand is pain from de loss of some1 you love
i don't mean to insult u or anything.
but i'm hurtin once more.
for u.
i had promised myself
not to shed tears for you anymore.
but now.
it just comes.
for what i don't know
mayb cos of my own selfishess...
so many tyms i had pushed the memory aside.but i can't. i'm sorry baBy i didn't meant for this to happen. this tym. words can't describ how i feel now. surprisingly, i can't say much this tym.
_____________________________________
HEYY!!
SORRY FOR THE LAGG IN BLOGGIN AYE!!=)
i went setosa with agnes today.WHOO BABY IT WAS FUN!hahahs in n outta da sea puttin suntan lotion on n on n on playing splashin gossipin suntannin.whooo!!1st day of dec hols we're gonna go again!hahahs went for the bikin trail again. haha!so fun okayys!n tiring yet. haha.waddya know?my stamina dropped x(( hahahs den went to meet baBy fer a while den met my parents fer seafood!BWEEH~!many fun ridiculous stuff had happened.hahahs but yet i love my friends!& & my baBy too!!!!!!! they whom had alwais been by my side jokin cheerin helpin me n all. my baBy, er zii TOTO-CHAN SZETOH xDD,dean da idiot,shane the ?haha. nigel even.hahahs n of course JASON & GILBERT thous gill is an idiot who loves to bully me xDD hahas. grahh!!i miss step n angie!!& & PRIS WO HEN XIANG NI HE DENISE!!awww nigels' at HK now. NIGEL DON'T FORGET OUR GIFTS!!xDD chey i'm greedy xDD jkin neh. nig's comin backk in 2 days tym.ahhahs.hrmm so far so good. my parents approve of baBy.xDD heyy baBy i <33 you so don't think i don't okayys?cheer upp pls don't go nuts anymore...
_________________________________
Guys. realize that the girl
holding onto u…
is PERFECT in their own special way.
The way she laughs..
The way she cries for every single thing..
The way she loves you..
The way she tries to please you...
Always remember that.
She can always get up and walk away,
getting someone else who can love her
more.
For all do not know,
there is someone out there wooing her
already,
but she is rejecting,
a maybe perfect love for her..
There might also be someone out there..
who is willing to love her more than you
are loving
her now,
fufill her every need and love her as
much as she
loves you.
Understand that.
Imagine this, guys.
When you are holding her today...
and then you cheat on her by hugging
and kissing another gal.
and then you run back to her...
and u do the same....
but you still see love in her eyes for you...
What do you think?
Do you feel the hurt?
Can you feel the guilt?
She loves you not because you are
good looking,
u are some one whom is very famous,
buy her things,
or whatever else!!!
She loves you for who you are.
Your every touch, every word you say,
everything you do. Which creates a
very big diff towards her!
Guys.
Cherish and appreciate your girl.
Don't break her fragile heart.
She is the only one who can love you
that way. Maybe sme one else can
But it doesn’t stay long…
You won't wanna regret letting go of that
special
girl you have.
For everything she has done for you, the
least
you
can do is to give her unconditional love
as she
has given to you. And at least be happY wiT it Then
LateR REGRETTTING!
& i tot...
collaspe break die
satanic anger harted n pain
vulgarities hurled
fuck you shuddap
insanity
bring me back my sanity
i still love you
both
hurl me thru thy darkness
o7 sept
1o.55.p.m.
dEaDhEaRt ;
8:00 AM
Thursday, August 31, 2006
sigh somehow i wish i cann really be alone for the whole day w/o a care in the world & all. i really hate myself. for everything that went wrong. someehow somewhat it alwais seems to b my fault. alwais pms-in & all. i still can't wipe out the pain within. still flickerin. left by him...zzZz & to make matters worst, my dad was very nice ytd to throw a scissors at me & yell vulgars & such at me. just cos i brought some shorts? why is it my mom cann wear it my sis cann wear i can't?y does it seems lyk the world is bias against me?is it just me or is it my attitude?or what?i seriously realised something really dumb these few days.i don't appear so emotional anymore. mayb 's cos i can't cry anymore...ytd that shock didn even make me cry. usually i'll just burst out cryin & anger my dad more. but ytd i only had the feelin of wantin to cry but nothing seems to come out. lyk i'm dried upp.& a few days backk when something was wrong btwn me & him. we were quiet. i wanted to cry. but nothing came out...i really wann have a real good long cry...i'm breaking dwn with the stress welled upp inside me. i may appear harsh to him. but i really cannot bring myself to b nice or sweet to ppl. i alwais feel a twige of sadness no matter what. i really hate this.. i alwais feel bad too....lyk i'm usin ppl & all...i feel guilty. i feel hurt. i feel lyk i'm not myself...but i somehow know i can't revert backk anymore...i can't stop spurting vulgars...i can't stop acting lyk some slut...mayb thats cos i really am now?screw i really hate myself now. i really wanna just destroy everything...i feel lyk i'm not really alive yet alive...makes no sense i know. living dead once again ehh?i'm sick of everything. lyf & all. i'm bored of everything. i crave fun. but how cann there be fun w/o lauffter?lauffter w/o happiness?happiness w/o him?i really hate to admit it but i still miss him. i'm sorry darling but its still the ultimate truth. i've been hidin so long & acting lyk its ok but its not. not yet. not now. somehow...sigh whats the use?i'm being a complete idiot. i really just wanna slp slp slp lyk some idiot grow pale weak & all. n den ultimately die. i crave slp the most. can't ever get enuff of it. slpin is free. you don't have to pay for it. you don't have worries by slpin. you don't have to think much don't have to fear feel or what unless you have dreams. be it good or bad but when you wake upp its gone. den all you have to do is fall backk aslp to forget it all. i'm sorry i'm just in a really bad mood again...nothing seems to help. i'm just lyk that. i want my shorts backk la fuck. i can't ask for it backk my dad scolded me. my mom reprimanded me. fucking hell they seriously don't understand. sometimes i even feel that no ones understands me!mayb its cos i don't give them a chance?i don't know. ok maybe i should stop borin my readers & just stop all this endless whinin & self pitiness.
31st august 2oo6
what do YOU know?
living in your lyf of luxury w/o care
having a sliver spoon in your mouth since birth you all.
w/o much pain & hatred.
havin fun & normal breakups which is nothing to you makin a big deal outta it
ever expirince what i went thru?
no?
SHUDDAP!
i think ultimately vic is the one & only 1 who did...
mayb worse den me...?
sigh screw the whole world..
11.15.p.m.
dEaDhEaRt ;
8:20 AM
Monday, August 28, 2006
o.0 theres gonna be some kinda stuff going on at sentosa on de 1st of september. hahahs i wanna go! 6pm-6am woah i doubt so i cann... x((anyway...
HAPPY 1ST MONTH ANNI SWEETIE!
nothing much to blog about but HEYY BAYBEH!I LOVE YOU YEA?i don't care how you look lyk or what other ppl think...just don't...DON'T change the way you treat me baybeh!MMMUAAHHH!!
HEY MY DEAREST BROTHER[now dArling you don't go jealous again hor... xDD]
I LOVE PLAYING WITH YOUR HAIR!HAHA
SO SOFT & EASY TO MESS!!
<33s
i love my la0g0ng & bestie!!
i love my 2 baybehs.
muahh!
28th august 2oo6
8.56.p.m.
grahh TUITION!
T.T
dEaDhEaRt ;
5:58 AM
Sunday, August 27, 2006
sigh i'm sick of this
to make matter worse dArling has thath jealousy twige in him again. bloody hell i'm rather sick of this. i care ok? i really do? i love you but you just simply claim you can't feel it sometimes. somehow somewhat i get pissed somehow...i know you care you love me & want the best for me but can't you c dArling...i lyk tohave my freedom sometyms w/o you gettin jealous...& when you get jealous over the slightest thing i get pissed. & when i get pissed i wanna b left alone & you think i'm ignorin you ,thou i partially am, and you start apologisin & sayin stuff that when i read it cuts me. can't you c?i never said you are not a good bf. i never said you couldn give me happiness. i'm happy just lyk dat. i may lyk rich guys good lookin guys but i never asked of that qualities to b in my boyfriend. i just want my bf to treat my good & is willing to b by my side no matter what happen.zlich simple thats all. some1 who i cann b with the rest of my lyf contented & happy. don;t you c?thats ALL!I LOVE YOU!i don't care what others say. you treat me well enuff. the stuff you did for me incomparable. the things you went thru. ok? dArling? i think one day we should just sit down n trash everything out that is if i find the guts to one day...
baBy i really love you...
please?
onehgai...
dEaDhEaRt ;
7:58 AM
sigh i'm sick of this
to make matter worse dArling has thath jealousy twige in him again. bloody hell i'm rather sick of this. i care ok? i really do? i love you but you just simply claim you can't feel it sometimes. somehow somewhat i get pissed somehow...i know you care you love me & want the best for me but can't you c dArling...i lyk tohave my freedom sometyms w/o you gettin jealous...& when you get jealous over the slightest thing i get pissed. & when i get pissed i wanna b left alone & you think i'm ignorin you ,thou i partially am, and you start apologisin & sayin stuff that when i read it cuts me. can't you c?i never said you are not a good bf. i never said you couldn give me happiness. i'm happy just lyk dat. i may lyk rich guys good lookin guys but i never asked of that qualities to b in my boyfriend. i just want my bf to treat my good & is willing to b by my side no matter what happen.zlich simple thats all. some1 who i cann b with the rest of my lyf contented & happy. don;t you c?thats ALL!I LOVE YOU!i don't care what others say. you treat me well enuff. the stuff you did for me incomparable. the things you went thru. ok? dArling? i think one day we should just sit down n trash everything out that is if i find the guts to one day...
baBy i really love you...
please?
onehgai...
dEaDhEaRt ;
7:45 AM
sigh i'm feeling that again. i don't know why. i'm feeling the agony of having to be sensitive & putting others before me & all.i wish i'm heartless somethimes. THEN i cann do whatever i want without thinking how ppl felt & feeling bad & all. this sucks la....
i hate you ok? i can't stand you! your hypocritical behaviour. your acting & all. i shall talk about all. but i shall name no names. you who act lyk you care for me but you don't...act lyk you're damn big & all,flirt around so much...made a fool outta me.i didn say anything ok. you hypocritical person. you really sometimes...sigh i don't know...disappoint me by the things you do. i care for you as a fren but sometimes you cann really make me destest you. can't you c? de stuupid things you do aint of any use. i hate the way you are. stuupid coward.
and you. you stuupid bloodeh backstabber. you said you wont't tell her. you think i don't know but i know you told her everything. that i didn't realy lyk her & made her hate me. that everything i said. i'm am being very nice ok? by not spilling the beans & telling her. by not betrsying you lyk what you did to me.by not making her hate you by not lettin her know you betrayed her too. i put my trust in you & you made me lose it. precisely why i don't tell you stuff anymore. you were right to trust me cause i haven for heaven sake said anything about it to her at all.think about it. de disappointment you lead me. & the way you act...fed upp with everything & all? i don't know why...i am literally pissed off with you...don't understand y do i even bother to console you & try n help you work things out...
you...who act so childishly...you who think you are damn popular & so damnnnnn ass. i tot i could trust you. only to have known you backstabbed me to my boyfriend. i don't know is it considered backstabbin...but still. i lost faith in you. everything i've done for you...de damn tears...you even flirted with him...the person i care so much for...even thou you have a boyfriend...zanen desu neh...
so many others more...sadly lately i think it might b cos of friends & all these that keep me so burdened...so tired...so sick of everything. i'm bored of everything...you guys'll never understand how do i realy feel...it's lyk some...weigh?i don't know...i find that its hard hard HARD to trust anyone now...de few that i cann really really really REALLY TRUST! is my dEaR brother szetoh, my dEaR la0g0ng, & my crazy friends...gilbert, jason, dean, nigel, angie & a few others. now you know ahy do i lyk to hang out with em more?now you know why i don't have tym for some of you in school?i feel no need to nurture any strong friendship from our school...other den yunting. i realised our school is made upp mainly of backkstabbin...yes even rachel did...i'm not saying everyone is but ya...i just fel that way...the world is so hypocritical...n n.....i miss the crazy mad days. bowlin with lionel & all...i miss lionel...crazy guy...i miss sherlyn...wonder how is she...i miss rain baByy..sigh...all this sucks...
OK!!*slaps myself*NO MORE BRONG DRONNIN!!
went scince center with la0g0ng. had fun. too bad de dino exibit is gone...T.T wahlao i wanna c wann leh...hurmphf...anyway after dat we went take neos...xDD had funn~!
& &...I NEED GO ON A DIET DAMN I'M GETTIN FATTER!!x((
i'm still keepin 2 things inside of me. that i don't want to say for anything in the world...don't force it out of me...1 is rather obvious i think but the other one...still no 1 even suspect it...
guilty concious...
a world built mainly base on hypocritical comments.
sacarsm.
lies.
hatred.
backstabbin...
cann it survived?
27 august 2oo6
1o.21.p.m.
survival of the fittest.
dEaDhEaRt ;
7:27 AM
